Will’s Journey.

Hi Folks! Now that we made it through the end of the Mayan Calendar, and into the next great cycle, let us wish everyone a very happy Galactic Cycle, and may everyone be able to have a beautiful journey, with or without iboga!  For those who are wondering why they might need iBoga alkaloids in their Central Nervous System, here is a bit of lovely feedback from our friend Will about his journey with us! This is what makes all the hard work seem worthwhile! 

My Iboga Journey

I found my way to Kaitaia via my parents’ networks, who funnily enough were there when I needed help the most, at a time when the lifestyle I chose to live by eventually caught up with me – and that which I hold so precious was removed from my care ie my son.  This was my wake-up call and defining moment that caused me to seek help in the form of rehabilitation with the van Dorp whanau of Kaitaia.

I’d like to acknowledge my parents, for their support and prayers throughout my ordeal, through thick n thin have stood by me and reminded me they still loved me, although some of my poor decision making sucked and ultimately directly affected those closest to me that I loved so much. I’d also like to thank Sheryl and Whare for their moral and spiritual support that also influenced my direction into drug rehabilitation. KIA ORA KOUTOU!

I have used methamphetamine for 12years on and off, and at my height of usage let it consume my entire lifestyle, to the point where my only biological  lovely special daughter  was taken by her Tupunas via sudden infant death syndrome (S.I.D.S). I directly attribute her death to the lifestyle I was leading at that time and have had to accept my responsibility over time, and on reflection would be my hugest consequential learning curb to date in terms of my drug usage spanning over 19 years.

I eventually started selling meth to support my habit and to cash in on the quick money there was on offer in a thriving underworld trade and I quickly became accustomed to the high risk games and antics that came with the territory. It was this lifestyle not the drug, I would later realize was to become my addiction.

Upon arrival to the van Dorps’ whare, I was assessed by Anah regularly to gauge my substance abuse and usage. I was then put on the waiting list for an Iboga treatment which I knew nothing about at all!

To think of it now, I had at least 3weeks preparation leading up to my treatment date, which in my view assisted hugely in what I was to receive from my experience  with Iboga and Ibogaine. Many informal discussions with Dr Cornelius van Dorp and also Natural Herbalist Anah van Dorp proved more knowledge was vital to get the most I possibly could from the treatment.

My date was set, I took it upon myself initially to start fasting two days prior to treatment, and after consulting with the doctor and the herbalist it was OKed. On advice,I got in a final aerobic workout running Ahipara beach and let tangaroa wash over the old me one last time, I prepared our kai and readied my clothes  for initiation into the Iboga family,I WAS READY!

I was administered the total alkaloid of the iboga plant after sunset and was monitored for an hour before been given the flood dosage in comparison to my weight. Now previously, I’d been told to think mainly about the intention of what I wanted from the treatment. So approximately an hour into taking the iboga I thought long and hard at where I wanted to be after it and what I wanted to achieve. It was a simple answer to me. I wanted fresh change and a renewed, reformatted commitment to the ones I loved in my life, firstly with my children who are dependent on me, and just as importantly my whanau.

I first noticed the psychedelic’s and hallucinogenic effects of the iboga. When the doctor came to monitor me, the torch he was holding started shooting at first little lightning bolts and then larger ones above his head, whilst he was talking about the instruments the Bwiti people played. His whole being morphed into a comic illustration and one of his eyes seem to protrude larger than his entire head and winked at me and also started laughing while leaving the room. I knew from then on I was in another unchartered realm for me.

I won’t detail every aspect of my visions and experiences I had over the 13hour period I was conscious and subconscious, in and out of sleep in what seemed a week’s worth of a journey in my mind. What I will say, is everything I experienced had meaning and purpose. From as far back as childhood to the present day, I was shown many life tapes of many people who are involved or have influenced my life or even ventured onto my footpath of life thus far. My nine children and their respective mothers absorbed a lot of my energy. My daughter Emerina flew in as a brownbird and did a lovely dance for her dad, she then perched on my bedside lamp and watched over me. I cried with sadness and happiness.

I was put in the shoes of the people I’d hurt in the past and learnt how it had felt to be them. I felt ashamed, guilty, betrayed and kicked in the guts all at once. It was quite sickening really, but a lifetime reality of pain I’d inflicted on others, it seemed a harsh but honest reflection, I felt ashamed again!

It did feel like an emotional rollercoaster at times. But like I said before, everything had it’s meaning and purpose, and all of which I am totally grateful for, my last visions were more joyous. I was sitting in what I believed to be a gathering of village people, possibly the Bwiti, I was playing a drum and listening to an elder who had a beaded headpiece on. He seemed like he thought I knew what he was saying, even though it wasn’t English. It felt great anyway, being a part of  whatever the occasion was……my last recollection was me opening my eyes and thinking I had red army ants all over both of my arms, when I looked closer they were some sort of indigenous tattoos. I felt a bit warrior like and in my own opinion felt I’d been left a trademark of my own personal Iboga journey.

Simply Lifechanging!